What Is Writer's Guilt?
The fear of putting the brakes on your momentum for any reason
To my U.S. friends and counterparts: Happy Thanksgiving! To my non-U.S. friends: Happy weekend! I’ve been enjoying a lovely few days. I’ve had quite an amazing week.
Last Sunday, I went to the final U.S. stop on the Elton John Goodbye Yellow Brick Road tour with my brother and his two friends—who immediately became like family to me. We had the time of our lives.
Then on Wednesday, my 20-year-old son flew in from Chicago to spend a week with us here in Southern California. My partner, son, 10-year-old daughter, and two needy little dogs piled into the car and drove down to San Diego to visit my brother’s new home for the first time on Thanksgiving Day and had a brilliant time.
All of the action put me out the next day (I’ve been having physical issues), but because of that, I was able to get some writing in…so that was a positive!
And that brings me to my theme for today.
Writer's Guilt
What is writer’s guilt? It’s exactly what you think it is. And it’s exactly what I gave away in the title. It’s the fear of putting the kibosh on your momentum—for any reason.
The more meaningful the reason, the deeper the guilt. For example, holidays. Spending time with family. Walking your dog (this just came up right this moment). The point is—other aspects of your life that are just as meaningful and important but are sometimes difficult to know how to balance with your life as a writer.
It’s Okay to Not Write Sometimes
I realize this may go against the holy creed, but writing isn’t the end all. Yes, it is a passion. For some, a career. For some, fulfilling. For some, an escape. For some, a hobby. For some, their family. For some, all of the above. But, still, not the end all. And guess what? Drafts remain but days pass by.
Spend holidays with the people you love and don’t have just one foot in the door there—be completely present. Walk those (needy little) dogs—they won’t be around forever. Spend time with your visiting child—be completely present. Go to that concert—be completely present. You never know when you’ll meet new family.
Your creativity will be waiting for you—don’t waste away precious time with the people and things that also matter in your life.
Writers, what are your thoughts and experiences?
I couldn’t agree more, Kiki. I always try to keep the momentum of my writing going but sometimes taking a break does me good - a bit like recharging the batteries. Happy Thanksgiving!
I appreciate this smart look at how writers feel about postponing writing when it beckons them, but not as strongly as other things. I can't write in the morning, which presents a problem for me. Writing at night is not a good thing, too stimulating. So I try in the afternoon if I don't have errands, housework, etc. And that book from the library beckons me, too. Choices - it boils down to choices.